Home > Animals, Føroyar > Dear Lisa Loczy and the rest of the highly developed British elite.

Dear Lisa Loczy and the rest of the highly developed British elite.

Dear Lisa Loczy and the rest of the highly developed British elite.

I have the odd feeling that you, dear Lisa (and the rest), may not appreciate the following comments on your gifted post above, so why do I “take the time to comment on a post like this”? Yet I’m sure you are kind person, and a devoted fighter, who care for your fellow human beings, so please regard these scribbles from a second-rate to a first-rate as an attempt to contribute to your continued efforts making “the grind folk” behaving in the same civilised manner as you do.

It is not clear whether you are joining the well-educated and utterly well behaved crowd of Sea Shepherd martyrs currently gathered in The Faroe Islands, or you are the one who donated the lavish amount of 100 £ to Paul Watson. I guess the latter. However, you have my deepest respect. Not only because your knowledge about the world outside your McDonald enclosure is indeed outstanding, but also because you feel so sorry for us.

I sincerely hope that you appreciate my attempt to address you in your own language. The trouble being, that “the grind folk” do not have any language. In fact it is only some kind of grunting. Hence our “language” can neither be spoken or written. How could you miss that part of your otherwise ingenious characterization of us? Never mind; you are forgiven. Even intelligent people like you can’t think of everything, so let’s finish the language part. Under everyday circumstances, when we have plenty of meat and fat, the grunting is a good-natured one, but when the whale meat and fat is getting low, the grunting increases to a horrifying roaring, which not subsides until we have killed an appropriate quantity of whales, so that we can freeze….? Ahhh! There I almost was captured in a contradiction, you mischievous little pixy! How can we freeze the meet and fat if we don’t have any electricity supply? You tell us in your next post – ok?

And now, let’s dig into the core of the case. Occasionally human beings are offered wake up calls, like yours, which entirely changes their lives and habits. And occasionally messages of such brilliant clarity and wisdom have markedly contributed to the understanding and tolerance between people throughout our battered planet. Unfortunately some of this wake up calls are shouts from dubious, violent organizations like Al-Qaeda, The Nazism, The British Union of Fascists and The Sea Shepherd Conservation Society, just to mention a few. In common, all these movements were founded by criminals or incarnated ignorants: Osama bin Laden, Adolf Hitler, Oswald Mosley and Paul Watson. And what else do these founders have in common? To your information, dear Lisa, I can disclose, that apart from Osama Bin Laden, none of this extremists attended any institution of higher education. Adolf Hitler was casual laborer and a talentless painter. Oswald Mosley entered the Royal Military College at Sandhurst, but was expelled for a riotous act of retaliation against a fellow student. His prime qualification being the 6th Baronet of Ancoats. But your hero, Paul Watson – he at least must have obtained a superior academic grade? Sorry to disappoint you again, dear Lisa; he never reached your educational level. He isn’t anything but an ordinary sailor and a former skipper. His prime qualifications as a self-styled crusader and self-beneficial fundraiser is that he is wanted by Interpol and authorities in several countries – on charges of a substantial record of criminal activities. How can you, dear Lisa, be on the same boat as a person who appears to be a criminal and, in comparison to your educational level, an illiterate? Referring to your undoubted educational level, I take it for granted, that you at least obtained an academic grade, although it was hardly a PhD in sociology or in anthropology. But as the genuine and unprejudiced human you are, I have no doubt that your academic research on The Sea Shepherd Conservation Society and its founder, Paul Watson, was as comprehensive and thorough as that you conducted on The Faroe Islands and its population?

However, dear Lisa, as you not are mentioning anything precise about your educational level, I guess it is due to your pronounced humility. Anyway: your keen and accurate assessment of those crude village people, tempting some kind of prehistoric hardship in the middle of The North Atlantic Ocean, is probably the most intelligent description of a mentally retarded society, I ever read.  Being one of these non-educated cavemen, I am looking forward to enjoy you, introducing the retarded subjects of the Faroe Islands to modern 2014 British lifestyle and behavior. And I certainly hope you will learn us a lot about the famous and excellent British cooking. Of course you people do not consume slaughtered animals like pigs, sheep and cattle. KFC maybe – and McDonald burgers, whish of course are made from ordinary, healthy junk – not from intelligent, plethoric animals. And certainly not whales! I have one more request: please teach us how to use The Internet. By the way, did you notice, that ‘The Internet’ is spelled with initial capital letters and treated as a proper noun in the English language?

Anyway, dear Lisa, in spite of your adorable gullibility, you are the prophet we have been waiting for. You are the lucid genius who shall save this flock of barbaric villagers from their ignorance and primitive lifestyle. Especially I’m looking forward to learn how to pick my neatly packed, (fallen, of course) chicken and pork from the freezers in……how did you name it? Supermarkets? Oh yehaa! And we don’t give a damn shit, you and I, that this fallen animals are poisoned with all sorts of harmful chemicals and stuffed with broad-spectrum antibiotics, which eventually may cause us (Yes! You too!) being infected with ESBL, VETC, GRE, VRE, MRSA, NDM-1  and that sort of deadly, antibiotic resistant bacteria. But, of course, dear Lisa, that is the real British world of 2014, as you prefer it.

Your clean world in which the bloody mess in the slaughterhouses does not exists. And I do understand, dear Lisa: there is no need to worry about how the food, without spilling a drip of blood, managed to find its way to the freezers from somewhere, only you and God know about. Verily, if not embracing such evolutionary kind of gospel you are preaching, people like us do not deserve otherwise than being doomed and gloomed.

I also understand that you are a superior Briton, holding a UK passport. I have no doubt that your open minded approach to non-Britton is originated from the usual kind of formation to British superiority, offered at Oxford- and Cambridge Universities. Probable the finest self-important British institutions, where corresponding self-important Britons are introduced to the magnitude and brilliance of The Great Britain. Most likely you also learned to shout out “Rule Britannia!” But I assume you never learned about the former glory of The United Kingdom and her blood stained history of genocides in the former British possessions? OK, you are right, dear Lisa, that was inevitable and necessary man slaughter. How else could you bring the sublime heritage of the British civilisation to backward people, who do not “have the ability to listen, learn, understand or evolve”?

So let’s get to the point:  I do understand that you love adorable whales and cute baby seals, (so do I). But I also understand, that you dislike people who don´t have the noble eating habits as you.

And I do understand that your feelings are solely rooted in the usual abundance of British self-aggrandizement and arrogance. Indeed, dear Lisa, you are the right persons to save the World.

Yours sincerely
William Smith
Faroe Islands

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